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Here’s something I wish I didn’t know: Thyme smells really nice when you pour boiling water on it even though it’s alive and you planted it in your garden!

I know this because last night picking herbs I noticed a weird soil mound in the thyme, like an animal had sort of dug around. So I went to smooth it out and then WAS COVERED WITH BITING ASSHOLE ANTS and screaming and flailing and running away. These ants look normal but their bites are just unbearable, bringing up welts like pistachios and just itchy swelling for days and days. See my hand? Big red blotches? So I had to boil the ants alive. I tried to pour around the thyme but that would have been merciful to the biting ants.


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